It wasn’t long ago that I felt an enormous call on my life to write and speak for Jesus. I say this humbly, because in fact we are all called to speak of Jesus and our testimonies of Him! We are each encouraged to use our special gifts and talents for the purpose of His kingdom. Yet, I’ve known for over nine years that my call was to women’s ministry as a speaker and writer. I have grappled with fear and insecurity, pushing down the impulses to speak out. I was denying my true self and as a consequence I have dealt with a lingering unhappiness. I was not fulfilled because I was not walking in obedience to God’s directive. I confess today, I have not been a faithful maidservant to my King. I have made excuses and ignored directives. The GOOD news is that God has not given up on me! Tonight, as I sit at tiny table at Panera, enjoying a quiet meal alone (YAY for a wonderful babysitter!) I am ready to take this leap of faith and proclaim that I will speak as the prophets have since the days of old: I will be bold. I will speak biblical truths and share my life’s experiences as I walk in devotion to Jesus.
Tonight, I will re-launch my blog and share with the world! This is all because I obeyed when God instructed me to write and essay for Relevant Pages Press Motherhood Anthology contest. I almost didn’t do it. I tried twice. One idea never came to fruition. The second was poured out of my soul after a long and terrible day of mothering. I decided not to submit it. But the day the submission was due; the Holy Spirit was on me so strongly and would not allow me to push down the regret already welling up inside of me. So with three hours to spare, I edited my second essay and submitted it within minutes of the deadline.
The following day I woke up sick with a horrible cold. I lost my voice. And yet, I had found the courage to use my voice through the written word. As I waited and recovered from the horrible attack on my immune system, peace settled upon me. I was not anxious to find out. I just knew that this essay would either confirm that yes this is what God wanted me to do, or no, my calling was elsewhere. Fifteen days later, I found out that YES, my essay had been selected for publication! YES, this was my calling! YES, God was going to bless my humble efforts for HIS glory. The next day I was sick and I lost my voice.
There are no coincidences in God’s kingdom. That’s what my momma has always told me. So I look at the attack against my voice as a sign that the enemy of my soul is scared of me stepping into my God given calling. That makes it even more exciting to see where God is going to lead me. I hope that you will take this journey with me, and that you will be blessed by my humble obedience.
For information on the upcoming Motherhood Anthology visit: http://www.relevantpagespressllc.com/anthology